Road Tripping

Road Trip

In three days, we leave for a relaxing week-long family vacation in the wilds of Wisconsin.

By family, I mean my husband and I, the kids, my MIL, Watson, Watson’s dog Jada, and my parents.*

By relaxing, I mean once we arrive, because on this end of the journey, the logistics are just this side of overwhelming.  It’s a lot like that puzzle where you have a cat, a dog, a rat, and a small canoe and you have to get everyone over the river without carnage, except it’s actually a 7-plus house trip up  the river and there are actually two  canoes—not including the one coming up the Ohio River from Cincinnati—because you couldn’t rent a single canoe big enough, and the cat keeps whining about how unfair it is that the other canoe  has the DVD player, and the rat keeps critiquing your technique, even though s/he  hasn’t voluntarily touched a paddle in years, and the dog . . . is a really big dog.

By vacation . . . I don’t really remember . . . But I’m told the rental house may not have WiFi,** so withdrawal seizures should probably be scheduled in.

The plan so far goes a little something like this:

packingAfter dropping off Rocinante at the repair center, where he will be getting a new driver’s side mirror,***  Watson, Janie, Jada, and I will head up Friday to get the house ready—and make a grocery run to the nearest megastore, which is only an hour away.

My husband, MIL, and Sunny will be coming up Saturday in a rental vehicle and the DVD player.

My parents each have a different commitment in a different state that weekend, and so will be returning home Sunday, unloading their respective cars, loading a single canoe car, and heading up.  They should get there by Monday.^

And we haven’t even started packing, yet.  Or doing the eight loads necessary to empty the kids’ two-load hamper.^^  And I won’t get to it tonight, because Janie has a softball game right after I get home from work.

When good parenting gets in the way of good parenting, you’re definitely overbooking your summer. . .

But I have lists of thing to bring.  Many lists.  Many things.list

Some items are no-brainers:  All the coffee makers.  All the underwear.  My glasses.

Some items are tougher:  My laptop or legal pads and a pack of pens?  Art supplies for the kids?  DVDs?  Which DVDs?  How does “one stuffed animal and pillow per kid” work if the kid’s favorite pillow is a stuffed animal?^^^

The items on the grocery list are mostly theoretical and subject to the whims of six people with decided preferences,  one somewhat touchy canine digestive system, and the limits of our budget.~

But it will all get done and we will all get there and we will have a good time—especially those of us who are planning on abdicating parental responsibility between one and four every day for a nice long nap.  And I believe I just called dibs.

So, if you don’t hear from me for a while starting Friday, you’ll know that my worst fears about the lack of Internet access were realized where I am and what the general topic of the next few weeks of posts will be.

And if any of you remember what it’s like to have nothing to do . . . what’s it like? I’m getting the shakes, here.


*Our cat Toby has elected to stay home and keep an eye on things, including the sitter who is keeping an eye on him.

**Seriously?!  We have to talk to each other?  What kind of vacation is that?

***For once, I don’t want to talk about it.  Mark your calendars.

^Where they will spend the first two days opening Mother’s Day, anniversary, birthday, and Fathers’ Day cards, some of which have been riding around in my bag, signed and sealed, but unstamped, since mid-April.

^^I can’t figure out why a hamper that seems to be completely undetectable  to children is always overflowing . . .

^^^Maybe I should try installing a loophole over the kids’ hamper—those they can see just fine.

~ My MIL:  “At least we know cheese will be cheap up there.”  Sunny:  “I hate cheese.”


22 thoughts on “Road Tripping

  1. Haha! This is going to make for great posts. I hope that everyone finds the time for a little relaxation after all the excitement of getting there. Taking a road trip myself in two weeks, though it will decidedly be less exciting.

  2. Now that sounds wonderful. I vote (are we voting?) that you bring plenty of paper and pens but no computer. It’ll be good for you. Like broccoli.

    Have fun, chickadee, and try not to overturn the canoe.

    • But, but what if rabid, hallucinating squirrels break into the house and take my flash drives, mistaking them from broccoli, and the raccoons wander in and take a shine to my laptop?

      No, I must take it with me—it is the only way to make sure.

      I will try not to disturb the metaphorical canoes. There will be no literal canoes. I’ve seen Lake Placid—I know what goes on in unregulated, chlorine-free waters.

  3. Push posh. How much trouble can a 120 lb dog and a 10 year old create in the back seat of a car going highway speeds?! It’ll be fun.

    Like Tony Stark, we’re going in the Fun-vee. Hopefully without a detour.

    And I’m totally driving. Because I think it’s hysterical when you get road rage even when I’m driving. Traffic is so CUTE in the Midwest!

    • Feel my tiny wrath, you traffic elitist! 😛

      And, yeah, you are totally driving, because I don’t even have to ask the question in your first paragraph up there and we’ll end up in Quebec or worse if I have to deal with it from behind the wheel.

  4. Don’t forget the board games. If it rains, you’ll kick yourself for not bringing “one more thing”. Especially don’t forget that wacky card game that you made me buy that we still can’t figure out because we don’t have a resident librarian who gets wacky card games with the best illustrations of wizards and things on them. Oh! And if you can find the Doctor Who Yahtzee that comes in the Tardis because it’s Yahtzee and it’s Doctor Who and well, duh.
    Everything else is negotiable. Camp equals board games. And play doh. And a canoe.
    Have a great time!

    • We totally Munchkined you! 😀 I’ll loan you Watson for the weekend—she explains it better than I ever could.

      Doctor. Who. Yatzee. I’m in.

      (good ideas—except for the canoe 😉 )

        • I’m sure they have Child Services in Wisconsin, Lyra . . . so I’ll think I’ll stick their grandfather out there with ’em.

          Mom already volunteered him.

  5. What a great story! It has intrigue, adventure, comedy and drama built in. And your choreography is astounding! (Plus, have a great time.)

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