Have a WIP, an EIP, an MS, or a published work you want to share on your blog, eight sentences at a time?
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This week’s eight follows directly after last week’s, because I thought someone might be interested in what Dennis-the-other-groomsman looks like.
I certainly am.
“Weren’t you and David going to try out that new sports grill on Dumont?” Jack asked.
“Kirsten showed up.” The younger man slid his pencil into the cup on the edge of his desk, swiveled his chair around, and stretched, his spine making an audible crack as he unfolded his six-foot frame. “I wanted to get the new boards done for the McAllister account anyway.”
“Don’t starve yourself for the McAllisters.” The JavaNation account would have been a major feather in the agency’s cap, if the family-run board’s inability to settle on a concept for longer than twenty-four hours hadn’t threatened to turn the whole thing into a turkey. “Or Kirsten, either,” he added.
“I’m not,” Dennis said, scrubbing through his short, coppery hair. His biceps visibly strained the short sleeves of his light blue polo shirt.
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In about three pages, Viv is going to look at a texted image of Dennis and say, “When did Captain America and Prince Harry have a baby?” That wording probably isn’t going to make it into the next draft—though I would treasure a strongly worded letter from Marvel Studios (or Buckingham Palace’s PR Department) forever—but it’s not wrong.
A few of you might be wondering if Dennis’ appearance has anything to do with the plans I have for this secondary character.
Ohhhh, yeah.
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Modified image of Chris Evans filming The Winter Soldier, courtesy of Glyn Lowe, via Wikimedia Commons. Click the links for the entire image—you know you want to.
Earful of Cider 
Hmmm… I’ll take one of him, please. On second thought, give me a second one of him to go.
If only I had them to spare, Paula . . . 😀
Great descriptions of him. The readers will love him, I’m sure. It sounds like Kirsten is a bad apple. Good snippet!
Thanks, Frank! 🙂
Kirsten is a Bridezilla and David is her besotted groom . . .so, yeah, she’s a pain.
Ah, I see that now. They’re meant to be married, and David doesn’t want to go through with it.
Actually, he does. It’s complicated. 🙂
Hum, interesting to have another point of view. I guess your plans didn’t involve Kirsten if she managed to get him back to work.
Nope—Dennis and Kirsten are going to have very little interaction, considering that he’s in her wedding. Just as well, really. 😀
Like the way you are weaving in the tensions behind this scene, too.
Thanks, Sherry!
Kirsten is good for that, I find. 😀
Wow–hunky Dennis–really enjoyed reading this snippet
Thanks! I don’t know why I decided to make the secondary character the hunk. instead of the romantic lead, but I’m having fun with it, Nancy. 🙂
Mmmmmm….yummy.
Mmm-hmmm. 😀
Wonderful snippet. Great description, and good job if infusing information without it feeling like an infodump. And, I had to grin at the description matching the photo you posted…or…um…maybe you actually have a Dennis at your beck and call for photo shoots. 😉
Thanks, Teresa! 🙂
I don’t have a Dennis, which is too bad, because I’m short and married for love, not for height.
The photo is approximately a fourth of actor Chris Evans (whose best features are his talent and wit, but his torso is also a keeper). Prince Harry provided the hair and the nose. 😀
Aw, keep the Captain America comment…it’s hilarious! You’ve got me wondering where things are going…looking forward to next week : )
I think it’s funny, but it’s also perhaps a smidge too close to a copyright violation. Not sure . . .
Let’s say that Dennis’ thought processes aren’t typical, but he still gives good advice. 🙂
I’m curious about why the agency can’t decide on a concept for more than 24 hours. I used to work at a newspaper run by a family, so I remember how difficult it can be to work at a family business.
It’s the client that can’t decide on a campaign, so I may have to reword that sentence, Carrie-Anne. 🙂
And yes, the McAllister family is a nightmare. Luckily, they’re only a background nightmare in this book!
Great snippet with vivid description.
Thanks, Tina! 🙂
I don’t think it’s the agency that can’t decide, it’s the family. Good word portrait of Dennis.
Exactly, Sue Ann. And thank you! 🙂
Since this is my first time to participate in Weekend Writing Warriors, I hadn’t seen last week’s post. So, of course, I had to go back and read it. Now I’m definitely curious about Jack, Dennis, and Kirsten. LOVE the Captain America/Prince Harry comparison!
Thanks, Sandra! I’m glad this caught you enough to go back. 🙂
Nice description woven into the action. Too bad you can’t keep the Captain America comment.
Thanks, Kate!
Yeah, I’ll miss it. I tried subbing “Superhero,” but that’s too general, I think…
What a lovely, lovely man.
He is, Elaine! 😀
I’ve just become a huge fan of Dennis, can’t wait to see what you have planned for him!
Too bad about the Captain America line–I’d frame that cease & desist letter, as long as it didn’t come with a summons. 🙂
I thought you might like him, Charley! 😀
If the summons involved meeting Stan Lee, and not just Marvel’s lawyers, I’d go!
Lovely snippet – great description which enables the reader to visualize Dennis quite well. Nicely done.
Thanks, Susan! 😀
It’s so terrible when people can’t decide–I bet someone in the family has a strong opinion, and someone else has an opposite strong opinion, and everyone else is lost in the middle.
Too bad they can’t fire their clients for being indecisive.
That’s what I’m imagining, caitlin, though luckily, it’s all off-page.
They could suggest that another agency might be a better fit and send them to their biggest rivals—HEY!! I’d better write that down.
Nice way to fold needed information in without a heavy info drop. Great snippet!
Thanks, Gem! I’m always leery about infodumps!
Love this story, Dennis is definitely a keeper and I want all kinds of details about the agency and the clients and….ALL of it. Can’t wait to read the entire book but this was an excellent excerpt in the meantime 🙂 !
Can I just say… yum 🙂
Oh I could really like him! Great visual!