Weekend Writing Warriors: The Anti-Cupids (Gnomes!)

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 Anyone remember the (fictional) McAllister family, which owns the (completely made up) JavaNation company and appears to be incapable of deciding on an ad campaign—much to the hair-tearing frustration of David, Mike, and Dennis?

No?

Well, the McAllisters just struck again and the boys struck out.  Again.

But David’s thumping headache is about to remind Jack of something . . .

Gnomes_Lamport_Hall_1897

 

 Jack went to his office, found the ibuprofen, and was walking back when a thought stopped him midstep. “Gnomes,” he said.

He sprinted for the art department, slowing to toss the bottle through David’s open doorway.  “Heads up!” he said, already halfway down the hall.

Dennis was staring at his Art Deco mock up, as if he could will the McAllisters to reverse their rejection of it through the power of sad puppy eyes.

“Gnomes!” Jack announced, taking out his phone.

“What?”

But Jack was already sending a text.

 _________

Wonder who’s on the other end of that message?  Hmmm . . .

 

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The image is of  the creepy clay gnomes that “lived” in the rockery at Lamport Hall, as originally published on page 211 of  The Gardeners Chronicle, 25 September 1897.

 Lamport Hall was the home of the Isham family from 1560 to 1976. Sir Charles Isham, 10th Baronet is credited with beginning the tradition of garden gnomes in the United Kingdom when he introduced a number of apparently truly creepy terracotta figures from Germany in the 1840s.  And I’m sure we all thank him for that . . .

 

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39 thoughts on “Weekend Writing Warriors: The Anti-Cupids (Gnomes!)

  1. Gnomes! Of course, gnomes! Or aliens! Alien gnomes! (Someone needs sleep..) Great snippet — I can relate to Jack because I do things like that… expect everyone else to be inside my head and know exactly what I’m talking about.

    • Not aliens, Paula, just gnomes—but if they’re anything like the gnomes in the photo, they’re alien enough for me!

      It’s frustrating sometimes, but on the whole, I’m glad other people can’t read my mind. 😀

  2. I’m giggling…cause I’m reading your writing : ) You do it to me almost every week! Love it, anyone whose had that creative genius aha moment will totally understand this…

  3. Ah, the return of the headache gnomes, wielding their little pickaxes on their victim’s skulls!

    I love how you show Jack in the grip of an idea. He has to share it. Right. Now.

    • Yes! Exactly, Caitlin—fear and pain sells almost as well as sex, at least where caffeine deprivation is concerned. Or in my little world, it does, anyway. 🙂

      Thanks!

  4. You’ve definitely got me curious. Is he recognizing some Gnome threat? Did he get a great a campaign idea? Or is he just having a “moment”. lol? Good snippet.

  5. Well, I have no idea what’s going on, having just dropped in here, but I enjoyed the slightly surreal feel to this snippet 🙂 Gnomes, indeed!

  6. Haha! Gnomes! Excellent twist. It forces a visceral reaction from the reader–gnomes…you either love them or hate them. But you’ve already laid the groundwork for such humor here! Nicely done. 🙂

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