Have a WIP, an EIP, an MS, or a published work you want to share on your blog, eight sentences at a time?
Want to sample other people’s WIPs, EIPs, MSs, or published works, eight sentences at a time?
Be a Weekend Writing Warrior!
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One more week of Nanowrimo to go. If my writing hand and eyesight hold up, I think I’ll finish my 50,000 on time. It may not be a complete story, but the bare bones will be there.
And also a couple of Rosebuds—named after the Big Oops in Citizen Kane*— which is what you get when you’re too busy getting words down to pay attention to the continuity fairy, who has been trying to tell you that the great scene you just wrote can’t exist in the same story as the great scene you wrote two days ago, unless two of your characters are mutants and another has a Bag of All Holding with a (plot) hole in the bottom through which all those clues and handguns are apparently falling.
But I’m pretty sure these next eight are okay . . . at least from a continuity standpoint.
There are times when I wish I had a one or two predator traits—times when I’d swap flight, buoyancy and brains for quick healing and a concrete skull. Like now.
I opened my eyes, squeezed them shut, breathed carefully for a few seconds, and sat up. I immediately regretted it; my head hurt like throbbing, nauseated hell.
“You’re awake,” a voice said. “Good.”
“Lies,” I said. I reached back to touch the back of my head and regretted doing that, too.
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I couldn’t think of what to write next and I couldn’t figure out how to introduce my hero to the Big Bad.
So I hit him over the head with something hard . . . and ended up solving both problems.
Who knew?
I’ll try to visit everyone today, but if I’m a little late, please forgive me. I have a wordmeter to feed!
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*In the movie, a reporter tries to figure out why the dying word of Charles Foster Kane, a wealthy newspaper magnate, was “Rosebud”. But the movie also makes a point of saying that Kane died completely alone in his otherwise empty mansion. So how did anyone know what his last word was? Unlike Orson Welles, I’m not talented enough to get away with this kind of thing.
Ouch, I feel like I need an ice pack!
I’ll take that as a compliment, Millie! 🙂
I love the phrase “throbbing, nauseated hell.” It sounds intensely unpleasant.
I might trade away the buoyancy, but the brains? You want to keep those, duckie.
That description is from two migraines ago, Caitlin, and it was one of the two worst I’ve ever had.
Ha! Yep, brains are going to come in handy in a few pages. 😀
I like the first line or two …. well done.
Thanks, Iris! 🙂
Hitting your protag over the head with something hard is a great way to move a story along! You can’t go wrong torturing heroes, IMO.
My favorite line here: “Lies.”
Perfect! 🙂
It’s certainly gets the flow going, Charley—if nothing else, I can describe the wound in loving detail. Describing his lost lunch would be torture for ME, and I’m trying to avoid that. 🙂
And thanks! 🙂
I agree. Hitting him over the head is a perfect way to move things along. lol Great snippet.
Thanks, Joanne! It was surprising therapeutic. 😀
Haha! Yes, if all fails knock your mc out and go from there. I don’t know how many times I knocked out my werewolf when I was like how do I move from here to HERE? Wonderful. I love that he maintains that wit when his head is splitting. But I’m sure he imagines that’s all he’s got at this point, what with missing the quick healing and concrete skull.
It’s so awesome that you’re gonna make NaNo! I knew you would! Yes!
Tim’s mouth runs on automatic a lot of the time—it’s caused trouble for him in previous chapters. 🙂
I hope I make it, Lisa! Today was tough . . .
I understand & wish you the very same. Just keep pushing! You are so close!
Hahahah I think I’ve been where he is. Great snippet, Sarah, and I know you’ll do fine (even if the continuity fairy grumbles when you hit 50K) 😀
I hope not, Siobhan. 😀
And thank you! The continuity fairy threw up her hands and stomped out to have drinks and a kvetch fest with the editing fairy, who is NOT looking forward to our next meeting. 😉
predator traits! I like those! of course, I’m biased! 😉 great snippet, Sarah!
Of course you are, Elena. 😀
Thank you! 🙂
I think hitting over the head works best. It sounds like you’ve put a lot into this story. Good luck filling in that last slot of words.
I’ll have to do a little research about placement, Frank, but i like the effect. 😀
Thank you! 🙂
You’ll likely find the best answer for you as you research. At least that’s how it works for me.
Enjoyed the snippet. Loved that first line! Congrats on sticking with NaNo!
Good! Thanks, Karen! 😀
Headaches definitely aren’t fun!
No. No, they are not. 🙂
I want to know more about these predator traits. 🙂 Unconsciousness is always a great way to make a difficult transition, unpleasant though the aftermath may be.
I feel you on the continuity issues-I worry that my novel is riddled with even more than I can think of right now. Looks like you’re making great progress on Nano!
Arrogance and entitlement are two, but honestly, Tom’s being cranky and unfair, except perhaps to the predator who coshed him over the head. 🙂
Sorting all this out is going to be fun in that special way that isn’t at all, but i already know which scenes will work better than others, so I hope it won’t be too bad . . .
Thanks, Christina! 🙂
Wonderful description of how you might feel after being hit over the head!
Thanks, Gemma! 🙂
You wrote just enough to give us the full ‘impact’ of your snippet. Love it!
Ouch! 😀
Thanks, Charmaine! 🙂
Nice, I love it!!! Predator traits, wondering what will occur next? Great work!
Great way to solver your problem. 🙂
Thanks, Jennifer. It was either this or have ninjas crash through the windows . . . 😀
Hitting him over the head is as good a way as any. Nice work, as usual.
It worked for Chandler, Jeff. A lot. 🙂
Oh, yeah, that’s a super way to move the story along. Nicely done.
Thanks, Elaine! 🙂
Love this story so far. I feel sorry for your hero that he had to get conked on the head to move the plot along (but it sure worked nicely LOL). Great 8!
Thank you, Veronica!
Onto every fictional PI’s skull, some hard objects must fall . . . 😀
He’s coming around. I could feel his pain. Nice job!
He is, and ouch, I hope you can’t, Gem! 😀
Thanks!
Lol, I feel for him. A concrete skull would definitely be useful;). Great 8.
It’s come in handy once or twice for me, Tina. 😉
Thanks!
That sounds really painful.
Great scene.
I could feel his pain, well done.
When in doubt, clobber your hero. Good advice!
Hold on… Only one week of NaNo to go?! Gah! Gotta go!
I stole the idea from Chandler and Hammett, Mike. 🙂
And no kidding! 😀
“…my head hurt like throbbing, nauseated hell.” Awesome line, Sarah! Kudos on Nano! Hope your hand holds up. 🙂 Happy Thanksgiving. 🙂
Thanks, Teresa!
Happy Thanksgiving! 🙂
Awesome snippet! That first line cracked me up, think I had a conversation like that after a hard night of drinking back in the day…
Thanks, Emmy!
I’ve had those conversations, too: would you rather be rich and successful and gorgeous OR never have another hangover again in your life.
I don’t know . . . ask me tomorrow, if I live through this . . . 😀