Have a WIP, an EIP, an MS, or a published work you want to share on your blog, eight sentences at a time?
Want to sample other people’s WIPs, EIPs, MSs, or published works, eight sentences at a time?
Be a Weekend Writing Warrior!
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Last week, Leda told Tom that the reason she had tricked him finagled him into having lunch with her was that her father, the leader of the local wereswan flock, wanted to meet with Tom.
For various reasons, neither of them think this is a good idea.
After a timely interruption from a clueless human waiter who suggests that Tom try the magret de canard, some awkward small talk, an important phone call that sets up a future scene, and more awkward small talk, Tom ends the meal with a question about Mr. Swanson’s motives for wanting to speak to Tom.
“Are you sure you canβt tell me why? Forewarned is forearmed,” I added.
Her shoulders did that pretty thing again. “Politics, probably. Council meetings always put him in a bad mood, but lately . . .”
“City Council or Regional Council?” I asked. Delroy Swanson had a webbed foot in each camp.
“Both,” she said.
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The Regional Council is a sort of local UN for Were-species, in case I haven’t explained that already.Β Tom has, earlier in this chapter, so no worries about doing it again in this bit.
As I mentioned in Tuesday’s post, I’ve printed out all the scenes of this story, stacked them in a semblance of order, and am currently doing an outline to see if what I thought the story was about is actually what I’ve written.
I knew this story was about different ideas about family and the lengths people will go to protect them, but I’m also discovering a thread of unease with the difficulties and basic inequalities that come from having to hide one’s species to the majority of the world.
Who knew?
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Can you believe that I found a public domain photo of a swan foot in less than thirty seconds of searching?Β All hail Wikimedia Commons!
I’m beginning to feel sorry for Delroy — ALL meetings put me in a bad mood!
I’m with you there, but Swanson’s done it to himself. π
Always good to remember that regardless of species, politics always prevails. I always leave this blog with a smile. Thanks. π
I don’t know if that’s good, but forewarned and all that. π
Thanks, Gem!
Ah, swan politics! They always do seem a bit cranky when conversing. That IS a convenient webbed foot you’ve got there!
Don’t they? π I used to raise geese and worry about the noise ordinances . . .
And isn’t it? I was going to settle for a Disapproving Swan, but there it was!
Love the webbed foot in each camp…you are so clever : ). No post for me this week, just doing a bit of hopping and my moderating gig : )
Awww, shucks, Millie. Thanks. π
We’ll miss you—and that interesting young man you introduced last Sunday. π
This may be my first wereswan story and so far I’m intrigued. Very cool and original π
Excellent! I’m glad you like it, Michelle!
Tom, by the way, is a wereduck. We get all sorts through here. π
Enjoyed the snippet! Gotta love this line. π “Delroy Swanson had a webbed foot in each camp.”
Thanks, Karen!
I rewrote that line four times. π
Interesting that she doesn’t want to tell the truth, but politics always seem to put up a road block. Nice snippet!
I’m not sure she really knows. Delroy doesn’t worry her pretty little head about some things–but she’s more savvy than anyone guesses.
Thanks! My power went out just as I was finishing my bloghopping last night, so I’ll have to play catch up today, by the way.
I’m really enjoying that pretty thing with the shoulders. That’s a great device. As always, your tone & prose are on point. Nice.
Thanks, Jeff. π
I really appreciate your opinions on this; I’m always worried about the feel of the thing, you know?
Totally cool in so many ways. An original story far from anything I’ve read. And your humorous take is terrific.
Thanks, Charmaine. I hope “original” translates into “publishable”. π
Oh boy, things just got a whole lot more complex. Great snippet, Sarah. π
And we’re still on the first day . . . thanks, Siobhan! π
Both? Run, Tom! You really don’t want to get involved in this.
People who outline first might be more organized… but there’s something wonderful about a story growing in an unexpected way, too. It’s amazing what the mind comes up with sometimes.
He really doesn’t. It’s kind of a theme. π
True that, Caitlin. But there comes a time when every writer has to figure out why chapter nine seems to be placed after seven but before three . . . oops . . . and fix it. π
I hope the stacking of paper helps;). I wonder why Leda is so hesitant in telling him what’s going on. Another fab snippet that leaves me hungry for more. Hurry up and finish;).
I hope so, too, Tina. π
She’s new to speaking against her father . . .plus she may not actually know.
Thank you! π
great visual about her shoulder.
Thank you, Alice! π
Cute!
Thanks, Jessica. π
You make me miss home with this talk of “magret de canard”. My father cooks a delightful dijon and maple syrup “magret”.
On to the snippet, I like Tom’s perception of Leda’s father. He obviously knows who he’s dealing with and the basis of the game. I’m curious to see how that’ll develop.
Oh, yum! I’m not overly fond of most duck dishes, but this one is so good. π
Tom tried to stay out of politics, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t know who the players are. Thanks, Aheila!
I don’t like meetings either, but I do like the webbed foot comment.
Webbing for the win! π
Thanks, Elaine.
Tom’s red alert klaxon should be almost deafening by now. He should run (waddle?) in the opposite direction, but that wouldn’t be nearly as fun for us.
Have fun editing–i love that part of the process! π
It is, Charley—and please, let’s make that a manly stroll. π
He pretends he has a choice about this for a couple chapters, so enjoy.
Editing is a thing of fascination and terror, Charley. π
My favorite line: “Delroy Swanson had a webbed foot in each camp.” As always, Sarah. your writing flows so naturally. You really write great dialogue. π
Thanks, Teresa. π
I try!
Love this story, love Tom, loved the dialogue….I’m thoroughly hooked. How interesting what you’re discovering as you outline what’s been developed so far! Can’t wait for more, wherever the plot may take us.
Thank you, Veronica! π
If I set out to write a theme, I can get fairly heavy handed, so finding that one’s evolved without me is a great and good thing. π
I love the line about a webbed foot in each camp!
Thanks, Carrie-Anne! π
I’m trying not to be too obvious with the hints that Were-people are afoot (ahem). π
Interesting how she can’t say anything but somehow is still trying to make him guess at it and giving him clues.
I love it when a gal can do pretty things with her shoulders.