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Last week, a flashback hit our wereduck hero Tom, offering a hint about what happened to his unit in Afghanistan. Unfortunately, he’s armed.
His friend Turner (who is also one of the few survivors from that unit), is talking him down.
I moved to get line of sight but he moved with me. “What are you—Grant is still—we have to—”
“Kyle got him out of there,” he said. He’s safe, Donald; we’re all safe.”
“Wolves,” I said, but the fog was starting to lift and the desert night slowly bloomed into green grass in the summer sun.
“Only two, both friendly.”
“You’re sure?” I asked, trying to remember why that last part didn’t ring true.
“Hey,” he said, lightly clasping my elbow, “I’m only human.”
That phrase was his all-clear, so I handed him the Glock, sank to my knees beside the overturned lawn chair, and practiced breathing for a couple minutes.
_______________________
Thus endeth the panic attack. Let the familial guilt begin!
Donald is a nickname, in case that confused anyone—Turner has used it in previous chapters and is using it here to get Tom to believe him. The use of the all-clear phrases is also established earlier, when Tom speaks with Grant.
It’s really easy to double-check things like that in Scrivener, by the way. Just saying.
Very intense scene, Sarah. I think after that was over, I’d have to practice breathing too. Well done!
Thanks, Teresa! 🙂
Eeek, that was intense. Poor Tom!
Yeah, his inner demons are more frightening than the outer ones.
Thanks, Christina! 🙂
I felt the intensity. Good thing that there’s breathing practice at the end, phew! Good snippet!
Thanks, Frank–Intensity’s good! 😀
Donald? Donald Duck? Why didn’t I catch this before? LOL Great snippet and great way to bring someone back to the present from a PTSD attack. Nicely done, Sarah. 🙂
Yep! I was going for subtlety. 😀
Thanks, Siobhan!
Really well done scene with a lot of action-related tension. Great work!
Thanks, Amy! 🙂
Exciting and frightening. Fine snippet, Sarah. Love the guys.
Thanks, Charmaine! Yeah, they’re two of my favorites. 🙂
“…but the fog was starting to lift and the desert night slowly bloomed into green grass in the summer sun.”
I love that line!
Great snippet, you capture all the emotion and panic really well.
Thanks, Daelyn! Panic comes naturally, I’m afraid. 😀
Love the visual of how he transitions back into the present. Poor guy. He should concentrate on that breathing for a bit.
Good! Thanks, Caitlin, I was hoping that would work. 🙂
I think breathing is good advice in any situation. 😀
Daelyn stole my line. I love that same line and now I have to go pick another favorite and there are too many of them in that snippet. I loved the bit about “practicing breathing.” Poor Tom!
Awww, thanks, Paula. That Facebook page you suggested helped a lot, so thank you for that, too. 🙂
I hate making Tom suffer . . . but not enough to stop.
Fabulous scene! I love the use of Donald and the way they have an all-clear phrase. Great 8!
Thanks, Tina! 🙂
Glad he talked him down.
Yeah, it would be a much different book otherwise. 😀
Thanks, Paula!
Donald Duck, of course. This seems like a weird but interesting story!
Of course! 🙂
Thanks, Ed–I’ll take that as a compliment. 😀
So intense. Yes, breathe, please.
No fear, Karen! 😀 Thanks.
Poor Tom! Good thing Turner was there, or Tom might need more than just breathing practice & a hug.
Hi, Charley! 🙂
Turner is always there when he’s needed. It’s almost a secondary theme. 😀
I used to have to tell my walking DSM ex to breathe after one of his panic attacks. Sadly, it seems his agoraphobia and 101 other disorders have only continued getting worse, not better.
I love that Tom’s nickname is Donald. It makes me think of my fifth grade teacher, who was so obsessed with Donald he held a birthday party for him every June.
Oh, dear. I guess there’s some things breathing can’t fix . . .
I didn’t want to bring Howard the Duck into things, so Donald it was! 😀
Wow that was intense!
Thanks, Elaine! 🙂
Great, tense snippet. Love the line “I’m only human.”
Thanks, Nancy! 🙂
Intense snippet … great stuff!
Thanks, Iris! 🙂
Powerful stuff. I never knew I could feel for a wereduck, but there you are.
Thanks, Mike. Wait–you mean you weren’t before?
I was, but I didn’t know the poor duck was so scarred.
Yeah, it’s becoming a but darker than the initial concept implies. 🙂
Duck Noir needs to be dark.
Ooooh. Series title: Canard Noir
Perfect.
I like the way you made the shift slow and gradual. With Tom being so on-edge like that, I suspect a sudden change would be a spark that would ignite everything.
Could be, Eden. 🙂 Thank you!
I love the way Turner’s voice is so steady, no feeding the panic Tom is already experiencing. Very tense and realistic scene. Well done.
Wow, intense! Lucky Turner was there, and that Tom listens to him. Very well done scene.