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I’m tired of not-Renee and her stupid Expensive Gray dress, so we’re moving past Viv’s verbal trouncing of her, which ends with a last line being tossed over Viv’s shoulder as she leaves with her big bag o’ deli, because she is done.
Jack, slightly stunned by events and overpriced Pad Thai, has returned to the ad agency he owns with his brother, the groom.
We’re about to meet Dennis, the other groomsman:
Jack glanced into the agency’s art department on his way back to his office, took two steps past, then reversed them.
The obstacle course of furniture and mockups and whiteboards, usually full of the high-energy chaos of too many creative people in one place, looked like a deserted storage room. Even Lacey, their grossly-underpaid intern, was nowhere to be seen.
But Dennis was hunched over his drafting table in the same position he’d been in when Jack had left for lunch. Hell, the same position he’d been in when Jack had arrived that morning.
Jack knocked twice on the door frame. Dennis glanced over. “Hey,” he said.
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I have plans for Dennis . . . Plans.
Somehow a writer having plans for a character sounds like it might be hard on the character.
I believe you may be right, Sue Ann!
(And I think your characters might agree, too! 🙂 )
I love the way you described the furniture. Nicely done!
Thanks, Jess!
There’s a bijou ad agency next to my library, and they rarely close their blinds—I took inventory. 😀
Dennis seems to really enjoy what he is doing if he didn’t even move. I can understand Jack’s feeling.
Love it–love the description of the art department–sounds a little like the newspaper office where I used to work. Can’t wait to see what happens to Dennis.
Thanks, Nancy! 😀
Thanks, Linda. 🙂
So many questions suggested by this scene. I need more…is everyone else in the art dept at lunch and what is Dennis working on so intently he skips lunch and comes in early?
It is lunch, Gem, but the answer to your other question is in the next bit. 🙂
Nice description. I kinda like Dennis already and am interested in what he’s working on. The only thing I noticed was the last sentence: Dennis glanced over. “Hey,” he said. Perhaps you could have the narration like: Dennis glanced over and said, “Hey.” Just thought I’d point it out, but I’ll let you decide. Great snippet!
Thanks, Frank. 🙂
I’ll look at how that sentence sits with the next paragraph and decide—I do tend towards choppy dialogue sometimes, so it’s always good to check.
Haha! Dennis, oh my, will be fun to write! He is a driven, hard-working, cast aside life and fun, blank slate. 🙂 And I love Sue Ann’s comment! Good 8. Sarah. 🙂
When left to his own devices, maybe, Teresa . . . which would be a shame. 😀
Love the description of the room and have to wonder where have all the people gone? I think I’d have backtracked to find out, too.
Thanks, Paula. 🙂
Honestly, they’re mostly at lunch, which I’m hoping says a bit about Dennis . . .
He’s either really devoted to his job, or desperately needs a life away from work. I’d love to work in an art department like that.
Yes to both, Carrie-Anne! 🙂 And I would, too, though my artistic ability is limited to sad doodled daisies and sailboats.
Got me wondering two things…where have all the people gone, and what the hell is Dennis working on that keeps him hunched over so? Looking forward to more : )
Dennis is working on mock ups for the Client from Hades, Millie—and he’s too tall for his table. 😀
I LOVE your writing and you can write about anything and anyone in this world you’ve got going and I Will Read It. Excellent excerpt!
Thank you, Veronica! You say the nicest things! 😀
Oh good. I can’t wait to find out what the plans are.
BWAHAHAHahahahhahahahaha! 😀
I love your writing too. It’s very descriptive and flows so smoothy. Even your lead in is very wordsmithy. 🙂 Can’t wait to see what Dennis’ story is.
The Murders of Polly Frisch
Oh, I wonder where everyone went… It has to be something interesting.
Every office needs a grossly underpaid intern. I hope we get to meet her, too.
I look forward to these plans.
So do I, Mike! 😀
You can tell it is advertising. They actually pay interns. Also just like an ad agency there is really only one person doing the work while everyone else is OTL.. 🙂 Good snippet with alot of info.
Thank you! 🙂