Six Sentence Sunday: Full Metal Librarian XXVI (Mob Dramatics)

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There are problems with today’s six, mostly because I winged the whole novel, learning about the world, and the Press Corps, as I went.

Now I know that Reynard would find hard copies hopelessly antiquated—all he would have to do is  upload the contract  into the Corps’ Central Dispatch and send every colleague in the Region a cease and desist.

Though bandwidth usage and speed being what they are and always will be—and mobs being what they are—verbal reinforcement probably isn’t such a bad idea:

I turned my jacket collar up as high as it would go and stepped out of the house.   Thousands of red lights trained on me like the reflected eyes of rabid animals.  I flinched back as the Press surged forward, stabbing their antenna and wires in my direction, but just as the Police raised their clubs, the little Pressman stepped in front of me, holding up his copy of the printed contract.

“Exclusive!” he bellowed into the teeming night.

The calling voices stopped mid-word, as if he’d flipped a switch.  In less than ten seconds, the mob melted into nothing.

It seems a shame to deny Reynard his dramatic moment . . . but I’m still going have to bite down and change it.

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Previous Installments:
First ♦ Second ♦ Third ♦ Fourth ♦ Fifth ♦ Sixth
Seventh ♦ Eighth ♦ Ninth ♦ Tenth ♦ Eleventh ♦ Twelfth  ♦ Thirteenth
Fourteenth ♦ Fifteenth ♦ Sixteenth ♦ Seventeenth
Eighteenth ♦ Nineteenth ♦ Twentieth ♦ Twenty-first ♦ Twenty-second
Twenty-third ♦ Twenty-fourth ♦ Twenty-fifth

29 thoughts on “Six Sentence Sunday: Full Metal Librarian XXVI (Mob Dramatics)

  1. Well, that seemed to get rid of them for her. Great six!

    Unfortunately, sometimes we do have to change some scenes, but it makes our stories stronger. 🙂

  2. I kind of like that he has hard copy. It so anachronistic to the rest of the story, it’s sort of an exclamation point. Technology has made things instant and easy, but being touchable gives some things added power. Before you rework it, maybe take a moment to work in a plausible purpose for hard copy in the world. Just a thought.

    I really love Reynard.

  3. I love your turn of phrase – reflected eyes of rabid animals, stabbing their antenna. Vivid and memorable. It is a dramatic moment, and also hope it can be reworked. 🙂

  4. His one bold word, “exclusive,” tells me so much. He knows he doesn’t have to say a lot in order to get attention, to get what he wants.

  5. I like Susan’s idea that the hard copy is used simply for dramatic effect, but if you still wanted something similar without antiquation, have you considered a projector? Considering the Pressmen have so much hardware already, adding one little projector, that would beam the image of their contract across the crowd or the night sky, etc., could work, too.

    It’s a wonderful moment, either way. I don’t think that detail would lessen the effect at all. The imagery in this six is great–the rabid eyes, the teeming crowd. Just great.

  6. I like the hard copy, but see how you could also replace it with a holographic representation or a device showing the contract.

    I want to see this story in full, I tell you what.

  7. I loved that moment. You know, when I read it, it never occurred to me about the paper copy. Just figured it was some legality thing that it needed to be a hard copy

  8. The power of the press. That’s an interesting point about the digital or electronic form of the contract. But if he’s holding up a copy, does it have to be paper? You didn’t specify, in these six anyway, that it’s paper. Could it be something else?

    • Well, yes, but technically he doesn’t have to hold it up at all—the Press can access it from their personal readouts . . . So either I fudge the format or the tech . . .

  9. I like the hard copy, too. Maybe you should take it one step further and have it engraved on his wrist, kind of like what blood brothers would do.

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